And It Goes On

Bud light and a cigarette. Simultaneously rewarding in their poisonous venture. I let them embrace me to the core as I contemplate what it means to be here. My thoughts are invaded by the dark skies portrayed in the songs playing in the background. “The darkness holding me tightly”, yea that’s accurate. “When the picture’s crumbled up, it can’t be whole again.” The real life applications are terrifying. Let’s rectify this foreseen tragedy before it has its moment to truly strike. Preemptive measures. How careless this summer break has been. However there are purely positive prospects in the near future. Their coming. Time to fasten the belt. Overdrive. To proceed, the vision must be a committed one. I can’t see the end but I can choose my immediate path. Is that sane? Is it logically possible to come out on top when the ultimate goal hasn’t yet been fathomed? The ramblings of my ‘summer break’ haunt me as I take another sip of my cold brew.




the word that stops us in our tracks.

You must be willing to bend if you plan on reaching success.

It’s a scary thought,

at least when you’re as selfish as I.

Like the bound foot,

it takes years to achieve through a painful process,

but if you believe its for the better – bind away.

I believe it’s for the better.

We have to be able to look beyond ourselves,

even if it makes us want to pout.

Temper tantrums are not attractive,

but they are abundant.

Learning curb,

My gut clenches around the bend.

I am

Sexuality is a curious thing. I told him I wished he had a vagina; un-phased he smiled and said thank you. Later, upon request of an explanation, he pointed out that, in spite of his lack of my preferred genitalia, I accepted him. That was true enough; I like his personality, well most days. Continue reading

Evaluate My Work, Not My Body Art

I love this piece, truer words have not been spoken.

When I was an undergrad, one of my reasons for wanting to continue in academia was my aversion to Western formal clothing. If I became a Ph.D. student and then a professor, I thought, I would hardly ever need to wear suits or dress shirts, and such a life appealed to me. I had seen academics of all stripes dress in all sorts of ways, and I naively believed that this signalled something very progressive about academia’s stance towards appearance: wear what you want, because you’ll be evaluated based upon your ideas and work, not how you choose to present yourself.

But a recent article in a column called Ask Alice (published on the website of Science, one of the most high profile scientific journals out there) confirms my naivete. In this piece, an anonymous academic who finds themselves in a “conservative place” for their postdoc, asks Dr. Alice Huang, “Am I crazy…

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Social Media

Just A Small Town Girl...

Over the last few years social media has become such a paramount part of people’s lives, particularly in the case of twenty-something year olds.

I was chatting to this guy the other day, he must’ve been about 24, so not much older than me. ‘Have you got Snapchat?’ he asked. Nope. ‘Instagram?’ Nope. ‘Twitter?’ Nope. ‘Facebook?!’ Yes! But I hardly ever use it…[awkward silence]. His facial expression said it all: a mixture of shock, disappointment and disgust. It’s safe to say that was the end of that conversation! So I pulled an ‘alrighty then’ face, apologised for disappointing him and then walked away.

Is it really so bizarre to be almost 23 years old and not have a strong urge to hashtag left right and centre? #bae #tbt #wifey #turnedup #yolo. Is it bizarre not to want to upload photos of every meal that I consume? These days you’re only as…

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Something as minor as a loose belt can bring down the engine of a car; something as overlooked as stress can make a person crumble.